My New Year’s Resolution

Well, not a resolution, but rather a theme

I don’t create New Year’s resolutions. History has proven them ineffectual for me. However, I do create “themes” when I look to the year ahead and my theme this year might seem odd to some:

“Stop counting. Just do.”

What does that mean?

It means I need to stop worshipping at the altar of metrics, numbers, counting and date-driven plans, and instead just do what I want to do or feel should be done and let the flow take over as my guide.

How does this play out in my life?

• When I decide I’m going to write two hours every day, I often feel so focused on that goal that the writing itself becomes more an activity to fill up the time and less a joyful art. When I just start writing as I see fit and write for as long as I want the writing is better and I’m happier.
• When I count repetitions of an exercise rather than pay attention to how my muscles feel, I sometimes push myself behind comfort into potential injury territory. (Yes, I know counting has its uses here though.)
• When I have FOMO (fear of missing out) about having as much sex as others or going to the right parties and events, I end up focused on the number rather than the experiences I have that bring me joy.
• When I scope a work project I don’t try to use fabricated metrics by which to scope the project plan and timeline. Instead I use actual experience and a realistic set of expectations to guide the project timeline and I try to build in plenty of wiggle room at the end so we’re not just shooting for a date at all costs.
• When I stand back and view all the “stuff” I have in my life I will judge it based not on how much of it I have but the joy and utility the stuff brings me. This usually translates to me embracing minimalism increasingly over time.
• When I learn things in an ongoing or new subject area I don’t judge my competence in the area by outside testing or official assessments but rather by my own personal assessment of adequate knowledge or competence.

Yes, I can hear the counter comments already that counting matters sometimes. Yes, counting can be useful. I won’t deny that. But I think as a culture we are obsessed with counting.

We’re obsessed with ticking off many to do list items rather than focusing on the important few.

We’re obsessed with body weight and measurements when we should simply enjoy the body we have and try to keep it healthy.

We’re obsessed with grades when those grades have essentially no correlation to how we’ll use that subject area knowledge or expertise in the future.

We’re obsessed with money with more of it always being better without any reflection on what we must endure to make that money and is it ultimately worth it.

We’re obsessed with using numbers to quantify what should often be a qualitative experience or endeavor.

Anyway, that’s my New Year’s theme this year. Call it a resolution if you like, but whatever you call yours I hope you give yourself lots of freedom. Have whatever guides you for the new year provide plenty of latitude to enjoy the experience or produce the quality you want without arbitrarily feeling like the counting or measuring of it matters more.

Happy New Year!